“It was—unbelievably—not a crazy experience.” Online dating has certainly lost its lonely-hearts stigma.
Just look at how many people seeking dates or mates are flocking to matchmaking sites and apps.
If you find yourself on the market in your 40s, wading into the app-dating world can feel daunting.
Kelley Kitley, a Chicago-based psychotherapist who deals with relationships, says she would recommend Match above other apps because “you pay for the service, so it’s a higher caliber of people who might be more committed to the dating process.
People also have to put the time into creating a full profile, as opposed to ‘the swipe apps,’ which don’t give you a sense of personality or interests but are based solely on looks.” Cost: Memberships start at $20.99/month. You might know about OKC already, and for some it could be a blast from the past (hello 2012! The app is super easy to use, making it perfect for those who don’t want to spend a lot of time trying to figure out the ins and outs of a complicated interface.
Go for Raya.) If you go this route, prepare to be Googled and judged.
Making it past their screening process is no easy feat (unless you happen to be a minor celeb, you’re going to need some luck! But before you thumb your nose at it, it’s worth noting that if you’ve got a hobby that you really care about in your 40s—such as staying really fit, which we wholeheartedly encourage—it’s a terrific way to meet a compatible, like-minded person.
) removes some of that stress by giving you a limited number of matches every day at noon.
If you both like each other, you have seven days to exchange contact information and take the conversation offline.
It’s simple, easy, and the opposite of overwhelming, especially for those who don’t have time to spend hours swiping through potential dates because they’re, you know—working.
One caveat: Because the app sources your matches from friends of friends on Facebook, this might not be the best option for those who are trying to widen their dating pool beyond their community. According to recent research, First Met has one of the highest percentages of users who are 30 or older, with only 2.3% of its users being in the 18 to 29 age bracket.
), but selective element can be a major plus, since you know everyone else on the app went through the same thing. According to their website, find someone who is already on the app to invite you. According to Lisa Bahar, a California-based licensed marriage and family therapist, super-specific apps are great for older crowds with firmer routines in their daily lives.